Once upon a midnight dreary
My Hopeless Mind

This is not the first time these thoughts
have flooded my mind, swept in at
some insignificant moment, and drained
the air from my tar stained lungs.
The memories, oh, how I wish I could
tear them from my mind,
drink them out of my heart,
smoke them from my chest,
anything to rid my harmless mind
of the very thought of you.

It’s strange how memories stay,
the ones that shape, mold, transform you,
and how you don’t choose the moments
to remember, but sometimes its simply
the ones that cut the deepest, made you
bleed the deepest crimson hue, release
the cascading warmth from your eyes,
those are the moments that stay with us.

There are specific ones I wish to forget,
I have begged, pleaded, bargained with
my mind to release, but there are still these
winter nights where I wake up alone, tangled
in these damp linen monsters, reaching out
for you, screaming your name.
And sometimes, I think my mind is my worst
enemy, the way it manipulates reality,
how I often struggle to separate the real world
from my darkest nightmares,
oh, how cruel the human mind can be.

To where I almost believed you were
coming back, how silly the heart and mind
can work, but it was simply a dream my
hopeless mind created, to keep me sane.

I have been alone for a very long time now,
and to be honest, it never gets easier.